PSA: How to Tell Whether Your Black Man Dates White Women…

Okay ladies, this is a list of items, characteristics, looks, traits that you can investigate in order to discover whether your Black man dates White women without having to ask him.  You may add to the list as you see fit.  I’ll start this one off…

Your Black man dates White women…

1)  if he shaves his mustache but leaves his chin hair.

2) if he wears mandals (man sandals).

3) if the bottom of his jeans are frayed.

4) if he speaks no Black jargon.

5) if he is from Torrance, CA (or any predominately White neighborhood).

6) if some of his closest friends are White or Asian.

11 thoughts on “PSA: How to Tell Whether Your Black Man Dates White Women…

  1. I’m not trying to be too soft or too liberal…but WHO CARES!?! Those that are willing to be ostracized from the black community must REALLY want that other person (like joining a white fraternity/sorority = social SUICIDE!!) They HAVE to know that life will be even MORE difficult for their children than for themselves (which should already be tough.) Side note: you see that Samuel L Jackson movie about the interracial couple, Lakeview Terrace?? If you notice in the movie, the interracial couple only had friends who were ALSO in an interracial relationship….let it be. ALSO, tri-racial societies existed between whites, blacks, and native americans; and they were destroyed because the state gov’s didn’t want to condone that sort of thing….not that I was going anywhere with those last 2 points. 1 was funny, the other was just some FYI to get you thinking about WHY we condemn these things. If it’s the preservation of culture….EH!! Our culture as black americans has been more of a copy/paste method anyway. We’re the harbingers of style, and we are always changing anyway….yeah, I personally don’t care too much, but I understand why someone else would. Maybe I will give a damn when I have kids. But for now…WHATEVER!! Out-of-sight, out-of-mind.

    • Say my brotha, what typical styles have you noticed about men who date out of their race? That’s the point! While…

      Wait…

      7)if he is missing teeth.

      …While I share your…well no I don’t. I do care. I’m really interested in this lol

  2. Oh yeah, PSA also means Prostate Specific Antigen. I thought this would educate me on my impending battle with prostate cancer. Side note: F*** YOU 25-35 yr olds!!! After reaching the age of 25, I was free of homicide being my leading cause of death. Next was SUPPOSE to be testicular cancer. But NOOOOOOO! It’s AIDS!! THANKS!!!

    • Hey buddy. We like to live on the edge, and guess what? Black people didn’t feel like life was hard enough. We actually need something to struggle over in order to define ourselves, and since so many of us clearly so this Black president thing on the horizon, in a panic for identity validation, we increased our efforts in transmitting THE MOST DEADLY DISEASE ON EARTH! Now, we have officially won the “Oppression Olympics.” Gold bitches! Gold! You must try harder Mexicans…

  3. This is hilarious. I like fall into all six of those categories. Well except the black jargon but then again i use Jargon from like all over so whatever. Anyways you may be on to something. But here’s something to consider it doesn’t mean I don’t date black women. Hell I date all women. I can care less about race or the opinions of people who keep getting hung up on race and refuse to advance themselves. Start with yourself, do your best, help who you can but don’t think you’ve got fit some f*@*ked cookie cutter mold of what it is to be black.

    • Well, now. I’m glad I was able to earn a chuckle from you. More importantly, I’m glad that I might be “on to something.” In this post I make no qualifications about interracial dating. I am simply pointing out a few things that I noticed about Black men who date White women.

      On another note, I’m not sure what you mean by “keep getting hung up on race and refuse to advance themselves.” Perhaps you’d like to explain this a little further? My interest is piqued!

      • Wanting to succeed, at sports, at school, at music, at any positive outlet. That’s what it means to me to advance oneself. The drive to be greater, not more real, more thuggish to have the greater rep. Its all stupid unless your a rapper simply doing it to increase your revenue.

        We should instill are youth with a can do attitude. I am 24 my father and mother both told me the world wasn’t fair but that it was also no excuse not to succeed. My father always told me I’d be greater than him. My mother always told what it meant to be a real man and the difference between fathers and Dads. “Anyone can be a father it takes a real man to be a dad” sure you’ve heard it before. But its true. Oh and Kids without dads is not just a black thing or an American thing. Its prevalent everywhere especially in South America actually more so than here. Fruit for thought.

        We have to be better, we have to advance because we can. We and by this I mean exclusively Black Americans. Sorry black Africans but this is my motherland. My ancestors fought for this land, they were broken for this land, and they built this land. No one can take that from me, This is my home my motherland. And its something many Black Americans need to realize. Its like Chris Rock says America is that uncle that molested you but put you through college. That’s just the way it is. But we of all people can endure more and accomplish more through sheer will and ability than any modern race in my opinion; because its harder, because we can be better, because we are better.

        Obama wasn’t a fluke. Its because he was better so much better no one could use his race against him. I’m not saying racial bias doesn’t exist it does. But we have to stop letting our station keep us from even thinking we can’t reach higher grounds. Whether your black born poor or black born middle class or rich.

        I’m as proud as they come to be American to be Back to have a long Black military heritage. I love my country and the darkness of my skin. It took me a while to realize I was good looking and that my way of speech, my style wasn’t me trying to be something else, I like what I like. I don’t shy away from things cause I’ve never seen a black person do it……. Wow if that’s how you live your life God it must be boring. Here’s an example motocross very white top rider is black very black dudes dark as I am. I’m black and frankly if I am going to play up stereotypes it’ll be the positive ones like: we are better dancers, better lovers, better artist, more creative, more spiritual. Not the negative ones media and some hip-hop portrays were all sex crazed murdering thugs. It just isn’t like that. Most of us are just trying to get by and make things better for are selves and families.

        As for the point of this blog entry interracial dating. I have to say I have only been in 2 very serious relationships one was to a Nigerian for 3 years the other is to a White European to whom I am currently engaged. I never considered race in my choices. I simply chose the woman whose beliefs and interest were align with my own and whom I loved and whom loved me for me. It probably doesn’t hurt I am great shape and rather attractive. Hey I am still arrogant about my look my growth spurt came lat 1st year of college.

        Oh and to any Sista who has a problem with my choice of life partner. No she is not trash, the girl has 2 degrees. Also, I gotta ask have you even tried looking at a guy not his race first. Give it a go you be surprised what you’ll find out there. Color is back in trust me. I got lots of Asian and White friends always asking me and my Hispanic friends how to approach a Sista. I’m like just talk and show no fear. Black women are intimidating but that strength is what makes you ladies great and so I am a proponent of mixing you up with my non-black friends. Later

  4. Okay, so I’m wondering whether you believe that the claims of racial injustice are true. I get the feeling that you regard such claims as counter-productive and/or based in fantasy.

    Now, you’re a college-educated brotha (assuming that means something these days), and I would think that you would know better than to urge Black people to forgive and forget (mostly forget) what has happened to us–assuming that is what you are doing. Please don’t mistake complaints about the inability to succeed with apathy or minimalism. These are not the same. Most people have not been able to earn success, however they describe it, are not happier being unsuccessful, and I truly believe that most people (regardless of race) just have no clue how to accomplish their goals.

    In regard to racial injustice and racial progression (whatever that is), we must begin with acknowledging what has happened and what is happened–not ignoring it. One would be hard-pressed to find a solution to any problem that did not begin with acknowledging the problem and the genealogy of that problem. Race relations is no different.

    In regard to your soon to be wife, congrats! If you found your wife by ignoring race and focusing in on her character, which you found to be a good match for you, I think that’s a beautiful thing. However, I want to impress upon you that there is nothing outside the realm of politics (issues of power relations)–even whom we date or whom we DON’T date. Social interaction does not happen in a vacuum, and while race may not be a salient issue for you, the context of all social interaction in all aspects of American life is saturated with issues of race.

    Ask yourself WHY Black women MAY become upset at a Black man dating a White woman. Investigate that anger or disgust or disapproval in order to understand it. We ought to seek understanding in whatever we do. This does not mean that interracial dating is inherently wrong, and it doesn’t mean that it’s right either, but it is progressive for us all to seek to understand the issues the raise passions in this regard.

  5. This is really going deeper than the initial observations made in this blog entry of yours.

    First there is racial injustice in this world. It is an undeniable truth, it exist.. As for forgive or forget I don’t say forget but as to forgive who am I forgiving. Do I hold the sins of ones fathers against their children? Do I hold someone’s luck of birth race as a factor in why I am forced to work harder while life comes easier to them? I can’t its illogical.

    If you think racism only works from white to black your dead wrong. We as black people can be just as racist, just as biased. Don’t be foolish and try to assume otherwise. Fore example my father was full of animosity for whites. I was quite aware of this, it probably had to do with why my mother and he had many problems and why my adopted sister, who is white doesn’t talk about my father. Ironically he taught me to be better, to observe and not judge.

    Fact life is easier for upper middle class white males in the United States. In fact this is without a doubt the ideal socioeconomic starting point for off spring if you want to choose one. Regardless of this, race relations in this country while not idealistic are far better than what they use to be. You want a fair chance I am assuming but the fact is life is not fair. In a capitalistic society there will always be the have’s and the have not’s.

    For the poor white kid growing up in a trailer whose mom is whacked out of her mind or meth; the migrant workers son who speaks perfect English yet can’t write in Spanish and can’t attend college because his legal status is questionable; or for the poor black kid growing up in the ghetto whose mother has learned to subsist off the system; is life fair for any of these three? Yet the latter has the most opportunity to rise thanks to a great number of social programs that advantage the Black American Citizen.

    None of these 3 are in a great starting point but for millions in this country that is how life begins. Poverty and disadvantage is not just a black problem regardless of a disproportionate number of poor blacks relative to the majority white population in this nation. Should I feel bad about this? Should I fee resentful and seek to implement government social programs to force fairness. Maybe I should.

    Yet I also realize that it is like this all over the world. And here’s the thing, it’s not always black and white. I took a trip to Russia which is way more nationalistic and racist than the States. I observed how they treat their ethnic minorities. Yes they have ethnic minorities mostly Central Asian Russians and Korean immigrants. You know what, you couldn’t get away with that sort of treatment in the United States, well outside of Mississippi.

    How bout the disproportionate wealth between Palestinians and the Jews in Israel. The Palestinians have just as much right to the land. They have been there for a thousand years but the wealthy more politically popular Jews control the state even now propose expelling the Palestinians to Jordan another country with another nationality of people just because of racial and religious differences. This is total social injustice and racist and it can’t be looked at any other way.

    We think we have it bad, but at least we have not fallen victim to what is called white ido ism. There’s a joke about things Asian’s like and one of them is white people. Its a stereotype but very real for many Asians not just the physical appearance of whites is considered superior but so is the opportunity of partnering with one irregardless of love. Many poor Asians world wide and Asians in the US a express a sense of self hatred I have yet to comprehend . They not only refuse to date one of the same race they see the act as beneath them.

    As to your last statement honesty I have looked at it. I’ve found men in general whatever the race are more willing to date outside their race usually. Men just don’t always take it into considerations when partnering. As for me I don’t really care who gets mad unless the express it to me explicitly. I don’t care if a black woman feels inferior or like something is being stolen. Odds are I don’t know her if I did she know me and that my choices in partner are not based on any stereotype. Ask my friend Anisa.. Should I be with a woman I have never met who I know nothing about but who feels entitled to be with me because of the color of her and my skin, just because I am in her pinion one of the good ones. That’s just stupid when you look at it logically.

    Firstly I am individual not a member of some class of black men. I pick my partner based on appearance, interest, personality, and beliefs not to mention other smaller factors. I am attracted to lots of women but I wouldn’t be with a fat women regardless of race because I personally think physical fitness is important and maintain my own health religiously. I wouldn’t be with a Christian woman because I don’t believe in God strongly and abhor fundamentalist. I wouldn’t be with a woman who wore fake nails and lots of makeup because I like playing sport, going climbing and ridding motorcycles on long rides. I wouldn’t be with a woman who couldn’t dance to latin music because I love too. See where I am getting here. I chose a partner who shares my views, my interest and who I find attractive. She could be blue and I defend her and my choice the same way. I am not concerned with how another woman of my race my feels. It doesn’t mean I can’t empathize. I have dated many types of women from different ethnic groups. I understand the anger but then again I also remember a black female manger of mine who said she only dates white boys. It didn’t make me angry I just thought she was stupid to limit herself like that. I didn’t think she was wronging fellow black men. I just thought you have to be open to love from all sources. That’s how I view partnering and marriage.

    • lol…we are indeed FAR from the original topic of this post, but I have no problem with that. In my mind, truth is forged in the fire of intellectual discussion or debate, whether that may take us. So let’s continue.

      I completely agree that there are “haves” and “have nots.” This is indeed a central feature of stratified society–especially one with a capitalistic economic system. However, knowing this does relieve us of responsibility. We also live in a society dominated by certain sexual and gender narratives, and while we might recognize that things are ordered in a certain way, we are not doomed to accept the status quo. In fact, I think we must accept the responsibility for changing things once we know that they are inadequate or unfair. The saying, “Life isn’t fair” is only a truism insofar as we do nothing about it. A few generations back, chattel slavery was the status quo–so was second class citizenship for women and a policy of sterilization for Mexicans and Mexican Americans. In fact, genocide was the order of the day when it came to Native Americans. My point is that many people, organizations, and institutions were ordered and organized in relation to the status quo of the day, but that doesn’t mean that they were required to accept that status. Progression in any sense can only be achieved through recognition of mistakes, first. we accept responsibility for what has been created and correct our mistakes–our injustices. We must do more than acknowledge that things are bad with trite sayings.

      Also, we should not confuse prejudice with racism. Prejudice is literally prejudgment based upon a host of factors, but prejudice alone signifies no power. Racism, on the other hand, is a sanctioned system of oppression based upon race. There has never been an organization dominated by a group of color in the U.S. that fits that description. Anyone can be, and most everyone is (including me), prejudice to one degree or another.

      So should you feel badly about your race? Well, no. You should not feel badly about your race, but you should indeed feel badly that this nation that boasts of the highest ideals has failed and continues to fail time and again to live up to the spirit (and sometimes the letter) of those ideals. That saddens me to a great deal.

      We should bear in mind that racism is a White or European creation. Few Whites are okay with admitting that truth, and that’s one reason why there are so few truly anti-racist Whites.

      In regards to interracial dating, well, I agree that the content of one’s character SHOULD be the most important factor, and I think for most people, it is. Still, if you refuse to understand the position of a Black woman who may or may not be angry about interracial dating, you are missing a good opportunity to grow as an individual. Race may not be a logical or rational construct, but it is indeed REAL–as real as the love you feel for you partner or your mother or your friends. The idea of a color-blind society is a myth in every way.

      As for me (since you’ve shared your personal views), I only date Black women. Part of the issue for me is that the culture-based symbols and understandings that drive the behavior and metaphysics of ME and Whites is so different, that I would have a difficult time connecting with a White woman. This not a bad thing. It is a fact. I would have similar trouble with dating a Hindu. We organize our worlds in a different ways that may not be compatible. Also, I find Black women to be ridiculously sexy! That needs no further explanation. Lastly, I feel a sense of responsibility toward my people. You may not count yourself among the Black race, that is, that part of your identity may not be salient, but I have no interest in lowering the significance of my race. I enjoy my Blackness to the fullest extent (this is not to say that you don’t). Being Black or “real” should not be equated with a ghetto mentality. There is no RIGHT way to be Black. There are cultural norms that unite all Afrikans throughout the diaspora, but your Blackness is not in question just because you date a White woman any more than your Blackness would be in question if you were gay. Still, we should be aware of the context in which we are living.

      MAN THAT WAS A LONG RESPONSE! My bad.

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